Back at the office I was finding it hard -or I should say harder- to concentrate. I explored the client’s website looking for a way to contact her directly but there was nothing except a generic contact email. I opened a new email window and rehearsed a few ideas but wasn’t convinced by my writing. I had settled on the subject of the email being “The boss’s daughter’s glasses” when I saw my boss approaching my desk. “Say, Diego, did you happen to see a pair of glasses?” He asked. “Mr. Robert called, he says he may have left them at the office but I didn’t see them.” I explained to him the whole situation. “Oh that’s great, I’ll put them in a cab,” he said.

 

“A cab? But what if they get lost? I can deliver them myself,” I said.

 

He hesitated. “You’re probably right,” he said. “Are you sure?”

 

“Yes, it’s no problem,” I said. 

 

The Uber driver was chatty, verging on annoying. He told me he drove a taxi for more than 30 years but now had no choice but to switch to Uber. While reciting a brief recap of his entire life story, he kept looking at me through the rearview mirror. As he was telling me about his lesbian 11 year old niece he stopped mid sentence and squinted at me. “I think I know you,” he said.

 

“You do?” I said.

 

“Yes. You told me you were an architect, right?”

 

“Right,” I said. Frankly, I couldn’t have cared less whether he knew me or not.

 

“I remember driving a young architect with hair just like yours years ago, maybe 2 or 3 years.”

 

“Maybe it was me,” I said.

 

“Check your Uber history, see if I show up,” he said. I didn’t want to do that but I didn’t want to be rude so I told him that I had low battery on my phone which was a lie. “Give it to me, I’ll charge it,” he said. I gave it to him. He plugged it and placed it on the front seat. He kept talking and I kept alternating between “cool,” “aha,” and “oh really, you don’t say,” until we finally got to the destination. 

 

I pressed the button that had the company’s logo on the intercom and a friendly voice greeted me in corporate fashion. “I have glasses,” I replied. The voice said “great, she’ll come right down.” I waited outside. 

 

She came down, opened the door, looked at me, and took the palm of her hand to her forehead. “Oh my god, thank you so much,” she said. “I can’t believe I left them, I’m so dumb.”

 

“Don’t worry, it’s my pleasure,” I said. “Plus, you didn’t leave them, they fell from your head when you were fighting with the plans and the wind.”

 

“Oh so you were spying on me?” She said.

 

I tisked. “You caught me.”

 

“Well I’m glad you did because I can’t see anything without them.” I handed her the glasses. She put them on and smiled.

 

“You look cute,” I said.

 

“Thanks,” she said. “You don’t wear glasses?”

 

“I don’t,” I said.

 

“Try mine on,” she said. I tried them on and made a silly face. “You look cute too,” she said.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yeah,” she said.

 

“Ok now I’m really glad I came,” I said. “Forgive my lack of professionalism, but, now that we’ve established that I look cute with glasses, would you like to do something, sometime?” I asked.

 

“Sure,” she replied as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Take my Instagram,” she said.

 

I reached inside my pockets to grab my phone. As soon as I realized what had happened I turned my head towards the sky with my eyes closed and my teeth on a tight bite. I let out a sigh. “You won’t believe what happened.”

 

“what?”

 

“I left it in the Uber.” I explained what had happened and how it was hardly my fault. After laughing at our combined stupidity she offered me her cell phone so I could call mine. Luckily, the Uber driver picked up right away. He was already heading home and had no intention of leaving it for the rest of the day, but he gave me his address so I could go get my phone back. 

 

“What did he say?” She asked.

 

“I have to go to his house,” I said.

 

“How are you going to go?”

 

“I don’t know, a cab I guess.”

 

“Do you want me to go with you in case you need a phone?”

 

“You would do that? I don’t want to bother you.”

 

“You brought my glasses, it’s the least I can do.” She let her dad know  she’d be out for a bit and called an Uber. 

 

This Uber was the opposite of chatty, which gave me the opportunity to chat with her. “This is a funny situation, innit,” I said.

 

“I know,” she said. “It’s like we are on a TV show or something.”

 

“Uber first date,” I said.

 

“Well, let’s give the audience a good show,” she said.

 

I squinted. “Do you mean…”

 

She laughed and covered her face. “I mean a good conversation.”

 

“Oh, ok, ok.” The uber turned his head. “Should we play a game?” I suggested.

 

“Yes,” she said and smiled.

 

“Let’s play never have I ever,” I said.

 

“And what do we drink?” she asked.

 

“I don’t know, a fake shot?”

 

“Wait, I know,” she said and took out a small water bottle from her purse. We played a few rounds of never have I ever pretending that the water was tequila. I learned that she had never been to Tanzania, sang in an a capella quartet, or been stung by jellyfish. Then we switched to always have I always where I learned that she always takes a shower before going to bed and she learned that I don’t always use mouthwash. I told her I floss and brush my teeth and sometimes also use mouthwash, just not always. When we ran out of ideas for that game we played Fuck Marry Kill. We both killed Zoey Deschanel and fucked Charles Bukowski. We married Ratatouille’s rat. We’d go for a drink with Otis Redding. We’d have Gandalf as our Grandpa. She didn’t know who Ronaldinho was. We’d severely injure Drew Barrymore in order to save a baby animal. We’d risk our lives for Nelson Mandela, cook for Guy Fieri, put a muzzle on Greta Thunberg and die for our siblings. If it was a date, it was a great date. 

 

We were so caught up in our conversation that we didn’t realize we had entered a rather shabby neighborhood. Back in my hometown, you needn’t go far to find yourself in sketchy areas. We stopped at a metal fence that delimited the access to a building block complex that occupied the entire block. The buildings were large cement boxes indistinguishable from one another. “We’ve arrived,” said the driver. There were no signs or numbers or anything.

 

“Are you sure?” I asked.

 

“It’s what the app says,” he said.

 

We spoke telepathically again, this time saying “I’m scared but I’m not gonna be the one who says it out loud.” I got out and stood next to the door while she got out from the same side of the car. 

 

We tried to figure out how to enter the complex but there was no access on sight. I called my phone to ask for instructions. No answer. The streets were deserted except for a medium sized street dog that came to smell us and some kids playing ball in the distance. She came close to me and grabbed my arm. We walked around the block arm in arm until we found a gate but it was closed. I called my phone three more times but again no answer. 

 

The wind had gotten colder and it carried a mild stench of burnt rubber. She stood silent, rubbing her own elbows with her arms crossed while I kept calling and saying “I’m sorry” to her every time no one picked up. After ten minutes that felt like an hour, we saw a man walking towards the gate from afar. When he was near enough that I could recognize him I started waving at him and a sense of relief and joy came over me. He picked up his step until he reached the gate. “This gate is always open,” he said.

 

“Don’t worry, man. Thank you so much,” I said. 

 

“I’ll call an Uber,” I said to her. 

 

Once inside the coziness of the car, she grabbed my forearm and said “sorry, I got a little scared.”

 

“Oh no, if anything I’m the one who’s sorry,” I said. “We did give the audience a good episode though, wouldn’t you say?” I said.

 

“It was the best Uber first date episode of the season,” she said and laughed.

 

“I hope there’s a follow up episode,” I said.

 

“Of course,” she said, “now you can take my Instagram.” I handed her my phone with Instagram pulled up. “Don’t lose it,” she said as she handed it back to me. 

 

The driver stopped at her address. We hugged. “This was fun,” she said. Before getting out of the car she tapped her head slowly with both hands a few times. She looked around her.

 

“What happened?” I asked as she was rummaging through her purse.

 

She turned her head towards me. “Hey…have you seen my glasses?” 

​

THE END